I just realized I left with my last post talking about how crappy and depressed I felt. Whoops! I promise all is well; we’re just taking some downtime, reorganizing my TO DO list and enjoying what has become unseasonably warm weather. Seriously, mid to high 70’s are sorta creepin’ me out. But I’m warm. 
I have thoughts, ideas and projects to share and when I have some time or a little mental capacity, I’ll be back.
It’s November. I have to keep repeating that to myself in order to remember. It’s November. It’s time for sweaters and thick socks and many layers because, you know, it’s 70 degrees outside.
There are just so many ways in which I am not at all ready for this time of year. And the realization of that hit this weekend. Call is seasonal depression or call it denial, I just realized how much it sucks. I always thought Fall was my favorite season. Who am I kidding? It’s cold and windy and I have concrete floors under my frozen toes. The sun is hiding for more than half the day and my bed looks good by 6pm. What little color I could enjoy during the summer has turned to brown and did I mention I don’t enjoy shivering in a hot shower?
No, I think it’s official. Fall is no longer my favorite time of year. I’m jumping ship and heading for the Springtime camp. I’m wanting toasty sunshine on my face, a warm breeze on my back and cool dirt in my hands. I’m craving new beginnings and excited days. Spring cleaning, bare feet and camisoles. Wide open windows and blossoming trees.
I’m doing what I can to battle this annual slump. Curling up in my Granny’s quilt, reading stories intended to inspire and uplift or books with happy endings. They help some. And then the sun sets at 4:30 and I can no longer read the pages without an artificial light burning my retinas. So I shuffle around, to make dinner or clean up my neglected home and that ugly feeling of sadness pops back up. I read the lack of sun decreasing serotonin levels in your brain. Or some jibberish that really makes little difference when all you want is May.
I do have some things to look forward to…a Sustainable Thanksgiving, my favorite holiday. My doctor removing the heavy lifting restriction and allowing me to scramble to get some yard work done or my home rearranged and organized before it really gets cold, some thrift store shopping for winter clothes, and honing my knitting skills (thank you for getting my started Rachel…now how exactly do I finish?).
Most of all, I look forward to this passing as I know it will. Within a week or so (or within minutes of posting), after I’ve allowed it to run some of it’s course, my resolve will take over or my serotonin levels will adjust and I’ll feel happy and determined never to let the sun rule my mood again. For now I’ve got my cozy robe and my fuzzy socks and I’m off to find another book.
My grandparents purchased a brand new baby grand piano a couple years ago. My grandma had played some for years, while my grandpa only plunked around. Now in their 70’s, they’ve decided it’s a great time to expand their knowledge and began taking serious lessons a few years back. Their new piano was a gift to themselves. Who says you can’t learn to play unless you’re young? They haven’t heard my grandparents playing Big Band or Gospel.
We were blessed to have space and inherited their old piano. This sweet thing has been in the family for nearly five decades and now adorns my dining room. If you press down on several of the keys you can see the names of my grandparents and aunts and uncle lightly scrawled in pencil by a rambunctious 5 year old in the 60’s.
On occasion, Zeb will sit down on the piano seat his great-great-grandmother embroidered and play around with the keys. He has such an ear for music and rhythm and despite the piano being slightly out of tune, I love to hear him plunk away on it. We found a few “Teach Yourself Piano” books, which he loves to use to play Christmas carols in June or teach himself chords. But mostly he loves to create his own songs. Tuesday, he had sat down for no more than 10 minutes and put together a few notes that I’ve been humming every since. Perhaps someday (maybe even in his 70’s) he’ll decide to expand his piano skill as well. Until then I’m enjoying things like this that prove to my mom that her grandson is, in fact, a genius:
It’s all changing. The weather here is finally cooling down, my energy is finally perking up (thanks in part to my husband’s incessant water pushing) and the slowing of the economy is starting to poke it’s head into our life. Ack.
Not to say our experience is anywhere near as scary as others….yet. But changes are definitely coming, and making us a little antsy. Can’t they just hold off a little longer until we have ourselves prepared a little more.
For those not in the know with every detail of our life, Justin is a Foreman in the Carpenter’s Union. He works in the commercial sector, mostly big name casinos on the Las Vegas strip. Talk about a recession, look to Vegas. They say a good way to predict a recession or depression is to look to construction; if that slows expect a recession soon after but if it stops get prepared for a Great One. And Las Vegas owes it’s existence to two things: tourism and construction. The way I see it, this town stands a chance of survival only if everyone continnues to come here as their escape from reality. But construction (and subsequentally the rest of the town) will still be hit hard regardless.
The general foreman in Justin’s company is out to dinner every night shmoozing who he must as he tries to scrounge together enough work to keep their business going. Justin’s company does more high-end, finish work for places like the Wynn or MGM’s new City Center. But the general foreman told a story the other day about how MGM hasn’t touched their alloted $150 million remodel budget this year because their stocks are too low. Do you realize what $150 million means to Las Vegas? Thousands of workers saw nearly a year out of work from local unions to all the companies that provide material out in Wisconsin or other states. Our local economy isn’t quite so local.
Justin’s company has had to lay off all but the foreman and higher ups, who are now picking up their tools together to work on the only job they currently have. And hopefully this job won’t be finished until the next one starts - if the next one starts on time or even at all.
This all has Justin rededicating himself to a sustainable (i.e. frugal) lifestyle. Does he really need new work boots or will new insoles do the trick? How long can we possible keep our heat or air off (easy-peasy with our weather this time of year)? Where else can we possibly cut back? Is it time to cut the cable or dump the cell phones yet?
I’ve got food planning down to a science and am able to buy two weeks worth of groceries for $150. I’m starting (a little late but still manageable in our mild climate) our winter vegetable garden today to further help reduce those costs. We’re putting off other purchases, and making do where we can.
But still it’s scary to think my husband’s job may be obsolete in a matter of months. Las Vegas’ unemployment rate is at 7.1%, the highest it’s been in 23 years. And we’ve personally only missed the sweeping layoffs in the construction sector because of his current position. But he’s the foreman with the least experience, meaning he’ll be among the next to go if a new job doesn’t come along soon.
He’s been contemplating his next move - from fixing bicycles to fixing motorcycles to installing solar panels to doing whatever it is he can get his hands on. Luckily he’s pretty skilled in most of those more handy areas. But I think my real fear is having to go back to work full-time or heaven forbid, put my child back in school. I’ve been racking my brain as to what I can do from home. I’m fairly certain my job as a massage therapist isn’t going to provide for much in this economy. Perhaps I’ll don the Jill-of-All-Trades hat too. A little of this, a little of that, whatever we need to boost our savings, get our garden in and make ends meet should ends become further and further apart.
No, we’re not there yet in reality. But mentally my mind has shifted into over-drive. And this time I know it’s serious, because my cool as a cucumber husband is even thinking about it. Yikes. I mean, it’s not as if we didn’t expect this. We’re fairly educated people and we know nothing can grow forever and we know it all is pretty unsustainable. We knew within a matter of years we’d be looking at career changes. But still experiencing it - and experiencing it a couple of years sooner than expected - is nerve-wracking, to say the least. It’s a good thing I work so well under pressure. My hubby; not so much.
As my husband says, “It will all be over soon. No honey, I mean the world as we know it will all be over soon.” He’s obviously taking the disenchanted view about whomever may win. I am too, really. I kinda feel like the next four years are gonna be sh*t no matter which way this day goes. So, let’s just get it over with already.
There have been some highlights to the nearly year and a half we’ve been wading through this muck. Finding nicknames for the candidates (Justin came up with Sock Yo Mama, Zeb had us rolling with On Cocaine, and not to leave out Mitt Romney’s “Spit On Me”), we had a blast in the early months canvassing, fundraising, marching, caravaning and delegating for Ron Paul, Zeb has learned a load of political facts and has become just as opinionated as his mama…and apparently just as cynical as both his parents. And we’ve all been baffled by a lot of people who don’t give a hoot or only want to be on the winning side.
The hardest part is seeing the polarization among our loved ones. Even Zeb was taking his impassioned stance that far but has since learned that a difference of opinion is just that…a difference of opinion. And everyone deserves the right to disagree but in the end we are all more than our political party. Let me repeat that for some of you out there….we are all more than our political party.
Do I think the next president has the power to drive us into the ground single-handedly? No. I think we as citizens have much more power to do so, though. I also think we as citizens need to begin taking a more serious (and long-term) interest in our Congress and Senate and just what the hell they think they’re doing on a regular basis. We saw the public outcry with the bailout plan. Do we really believe it’s no longer our role to keep those people in check?
Therein lies our problem. Our short-term interest in electing one man to be the savior of the free world but our complete apathy in what our state and district representatives are doing with each and every vote they cast. Where is the accountability? Why are we no longer interested in those votes and only passionate about this one? We can’t sit around anymore, consumed in our daily lives and expect the world to continue turning and the country to keep limping along. As with so many other things, we have to step up and start taking responsibility. We can’t hand over the direction of our lives and country and expect it to all turn out okay. That’s apathy, folks. And it ain’t workin’.
I think that’s what I’ve learned most this year. My civic duty is not just to “get out the vote”, but to keep a keen eye on what Washington is voting along the way. I’ve learned the president doesn’t matter nearly as much as those other guys and gals we send to Washington. And I’ve learned it’s more about personal responsibility than having a savior of the free world.
But then again, isn’t that usually what it’s all about? Stepping up to the plate, demanding more of ourselves than we demand of others, living by example and not expecting someone else to do what we don’t have the passion to do alone.
Updated To Add:
Here’s *my* hope for change. *I* hope we can finally get past all the blind trust we give our President - no matter if we voted for him or how eloquent a speaker he is or how much we may like him - and actually start holding our politicians accountable for EACH AND EVERY THING they do. This was the problem with Bush and the Republicans didn’t want to call out one of their own.
Let’s hope we don’t all do the same in the next four years. Let’s hope we’ve learned our lesson from the past 8 years. Let’s hope the millions of first time voters out there continue to be involved. Let’s hope we never allow another President to steam-roll us into submission and let’s hope we all start thinking for ourselves instead of hoping Washington is doing right by us.
That’s when change will come to this nation. Not when one man steps into office but when more Americans step out of apathy.
Justin has been doing all he can to get us out of the house. We’ve been in “a bit” of a rut lately which gives Justin a task - something he tends to enjoy…as long as it has nothing to do with the fence.
Saturday morning he woke up and excitedly announced his plan for us to spend the day at Spring Mountain Ranch enjoying the Civil War Reenactment, complete with stores, encampments and, of course, battles. The weather was absolutely perfect and having never been to Spring Mtn Ranch we found we could easily spend all day lounging in the grass or people watching.
Zeb had fun running with the other boys he met as they did a reenactment of their own. He chose a rifle and Confederate hat at one of the “stores” (claiming “hardly anyone wanted to be on the Confederate side so I’ll do it”) and enjoyed a mug of “sasperelli” (root beer carbonated with dry ice). He walked around most of the day, holding up attendees with his rifle and questions as to where their allegiance lie. We enjoyed scoping out the vintage style bath supplies and clothing, as well as the barber, the loom and the vintage sewing machine. Although, I must say, I find it a little odd that nearly all of the Civil War replicas (from rifles, to uniforms, to toys, to supplies and more) were made in China. If there is anything that should be made in the U.S.A., shouldn’t it be American Civil War replicas?
My favorite part was listening to the Confederate hecklers teasing Abraham Lincoln. “There’s that tyrant!”, “10 points if you shoot off the hat!”, or “Hey Abe, I hear there’s a good show at the theater!” Hahaha They really fell into their role! All the actors were fantastic, funny and a joy to watch. All in all, we had a blast and are looking forward to whatever Justin is planning for next Saturday (he refuses to spill the beans).
More photos from our day here.
Oh, there are plenty of things you should do while on painkillers…
. Just don’t entertain the idea of doing what he does in the book.
Off to plan a sustainable Halloween and find suitable attire in my closet! Have fun and stay “green” this week!
I know I’ve hardly written on this blog lately. Suffice to say it’s been a crazy few weeks over here. And was getting crazier by the minute. Without going into all the gory details, I ended up in an emergency surgery last Thursday evening and am now a semi-permanent fixture on my couch. Now that I’m through the worst of the mayhem, sitting around looking at all that needs my attention and not being able (or allowed) to lift a finger is driving me batty.
I’ve instead passed my time with mental deliberation and continuously reading over a To Do list THREE. PAGES. LONG. No, I’m not kidding. Many of these things have been needing attention for months. But the summer heat tends to keep things pretty uneventful around these parts and now with temps falling back down, I would normally be tackling the obnoxious list.
My mind has definitely turned toward winter, regardless of our high’s in the 80’s. I love anything that allows me to shift gears. I love change. And since we don’t see the same kind of change those of you with trees experience, I make do where I can. But now, instead of shuffling through warm weather meals, culling our accumulated unschooling-related paraphanelia, preparing for Halloween or reorganizing the attic and the garage, I’m sitting here thinking about it all. Can you feel my pain? Well, thanks to some hefty narcotics, I can’t. But my mind is still reeling.
Oh! Lightbulb! What a perfect time to learn to knit!! I’m sure YouTube has some decent how-to videos. Maybe I can prep for winter after all by knitting up some fluffy socks. Yay!! I haven’t felt this excited since my Percocet kicked in.
We made it out for the annual camping trip again this year. We spent the weekend laughing, playing and relaxing with friends. It was a great group this year, although smaller, and we all had a blast. Although, next time I need to remember to tell a scary story with a not-so-scary ending. Whoops. I think I came up with about 12 alternate endings as I lay awake kicking myself for freaking out the whole crew. Sorry guys.
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